Somehow I believed it was my obligation to try to do the right thing by her because she had given birth to me.Burdened with constant worry for her father and the guilt caused by her mother’s narcissism, D.G. Kaye had a short childhood. When she moved away from home at age eighteen, she began to grow into herself, overcoming her lack of guidance and her insecurities. Her life experiences became her teachers, and she learned from the mistakes and choices she made along the way, plagued by the guilt she carried for her mother.
Conflicted Hearts is a heartfelt journey of self-discovery and acceptance, an exploration of the quest for solace from emotional guilt.
(Synopsis and image via Goodreads)
Imagine feeling frustrated and powerless in a situation you’re desperate to resolve. When you’re a child, that angst multiplies immensely because you are only that–a child. You have no power to speak out about what you’re feeling, and neither are you permitted to ask questions that might soothe your inner turmoil, because the cause of your dilemmas are adult matters that apparently shouldn’t concern you. ~ D.G. Kaye, Conflicted Hearts
At the beginning of Chapter 8 of Conflicted Hearts , the same chapter from which the above quote is taken, D.G. Kaye writes the following:
We are the products of our parents. How can they teach us what they didn’t know?
Likely, these words resonate with more than one reader with parents from the same generation as Kaye’s.
The author’s fluid writing style and storyteller’s voice gives the reader a sense of sitting down over a steaming cup of coffee or tea with a friend. The friend begins to tell you what life was like for her as a child. You sit in disbelief, wondering how this positive, strong, loving woman lived through the parenting received at the mind and hands of her mother.
Yet, our author and friend lives with a guilt burdening her for far too long. This is the skin she wants to shed–the skin of her guilt feelings. It appears to this reader nothing has been D.G. Kaye’s fault with respect to her mother and her mother’s behavior. The guild is just another layer applied like frosting on a cake. Only this isn’t frosting. It isn’t sweet, and it leaves an acid taste in your mouth.
D.G. Kaye is not ashamed nor abashed about telling her story and sharing it with those willing to read. Her truthful memories will unfasten for others the doors to walk through to the other side of life. Life filled with love, happiness, and respect.
Thank you to the author for the gift of her words.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who lived through an emotionally and verbally abusive childhood, one like D.G. Kaye’s. Remember, you are not the one at fault, and reading Kaye’s memoir will help you understand that.
Publisher: D.G. Kaye
Published: January 9, 2014
Kindle Edition: 202 pages
Disclaimer: I received a copy of Conflicted Heartsfrom the author in exchange for a fair and honest review. The opinions expressed here are solely my own.
Conflicted Hearts is available for purchase at the following booksellers:*
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Meet D.G. Kaye:
D.G. Kaye is a nonfiction writer of memoirs about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues. She began writing when pen and paper became tools to express her pent-up emotions during a turbulent childhood. D.G.’s writing began as notes and cards she wrote for the people she loved and admired when she was afraid to use her own voice. D.G. journaled about life, and her opinions on people and events. She later began writing poetry and health articles for a Canadian magazine as her interest was piqued by natural healthcare.
Becoming interested in natural healing and remedies, D.G. began reading extensively on the subject after encountering quite a few serious health issues—family and her own. Against many odds, Kaye has overcome adversity several times throughout her life.
Kaye began writing books to share her stories and inspiration. She looks for the good and the positive in everything and believes in paying it forward. “For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
Her favourite saying: Live. Laugh. Love …and don’t forget to breathe! is her website logo, to remind herself and others that we often forget to take a pause.
You can find D.G. on social media and her author and blog pages:
(Image and bio via Goodreads)
Like you, Debby and I have been pen pals on her blog and other social media for quite some time; I certainly appreciate her constant comments on my posts even when she’s up against deadlines. Her exuberance certainly shines through in all of her writing where she practices what she preaches: Live. Laugh. Love.
In my own personal life, I can certainly relate to the quote you pulled out of her Chapter 8: We are the products of our parents. How can they teach us what they didn’t know? Yes, indeed . . .
Thank you, Sherrey, for featuring Debby this week!
Thank you Marian for visiting here and for sharing your kind words. Have a lovely week. 🙂
Marian, I agree Debby is true to her message: Live. Laugh. Love. And that also shines in her memoir. Thanks for taking the time to read my review and commenting with such graciousness.
Sherrey, thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my book. As you know I love following your posts and was pleasantly surprised to find my book here on your esteemed page. I am grateful, and glad that just before I close my laptop for a techno week off on vacay, I checked my mail and found this. I hope you have a lovely holiday weekend and week. See you in a week. <3 When I return I will be reblogging this. Thanks again 🙂
Debby, I know you’re away on a lovely little vacay, and I’m so glad you found this too. I thought I’d dropped an email to you with the day but maybe not. Life’s been a little crazy around here lately. Our weekend was just as we wanted it, and I hope your week is refreshing. Thanks for allowing me to read and review your story.
Sherrey,Thanks so much for sharing D.G.’s story….she hit on a key point…when you’re just a child, you cannot understand adult matters…So glad she found hope, healing and love on the other side…blessings to you and to D.G. 🙂
Dolly, thank you so much for stopping by and commenting. Yes, those words jumped off the page at me. So reminiscent of my own childhood and its abuses.
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