I picked up my highlighter and read on. The words Tankersley wrote I soaked up like a sponge. Were her words speaking to me? Was it some higher power? Maybe, on both counts.
Recently I had met with a therapist who insisted I did not want to go back to the person I was in 2016 when I fell. He confidently promised that he was certain that I wanted to leave that person behind. That I needed to find the person I had “evolved into over the last four years.”
What he didn’t understand is that it is as though I left behind a lot over the past four years. There’s a manuscript lying in my studio untouched. I have ideas for two other books, one of which was “in utero” back in 2017. My volunteer work disappeared due to my inability to carry out the job description. My life as a wife and mother has changed in many ways.
I felt like I had lost my former self. I want to recapture my former self. The self I was when I left home on the evening of January 24, 2016.
Those four words, “[a]lways we begin again,” were like the lyrics to a favorite song—they stuck in my mind. But four words do not constitute a word for 2020. They constitute a phrase. Who has heard of a phrase for the year?
Off I headed to grab a dictionary and thesaurus and sort out these four wonderful words. But on my way, I found my word.
I stopped and brought up the subject to Bob, my handy husband. During our talk, he told me a story about a gift he received in church the Sunday before.
I didn’t attend worship that Sunday and missed that week’s children’s time. In the course of their special time, each child received a star that had a word written on it. There were extra stars, and the children shared them with members of the congregation. Bob received a star with the word “renewal” written on it (the link is to the root word, “renew”).
Bob believed that the word he received was meant for me. He brought it home to me. And I pondered this word with thought and heart, plus a quick glance at the dictionary and thesaurus.
That’s the history of my word search for 2020. Renewal seems to be the right choice for me. With four years behind me now plus the first anniversary of my surgery around the corner, I am ready to begin again. I am ready to renew my life as I enjoyed, lived, and loved it on the evening of January 24, 2016. I have lots of catching up to do “[a]s [I] begin again” with my renewal—the wife, mother, writer, blogger, and more!
Throughout the history of the writing world, love has been among the greatest muses. Did you realize that Shakespeare wrote 154 sonnets dealing with love, time, beauty, and morality? Pablo Neruda was well-loved internationally for his poetry which consisted of nature imagery as well as physical intimacy. Such works by Shakespeare, Neruda, and many others speak to the power of love, not just on Valentine’s Day but throughout history.
My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite. ― William Shakespeare
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,
I love you simply, without problems or pride:
I love you in this way because I don’t know any other way of loving. ― Pablo Neruda
Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age. ― Anais Nin
Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward in the same direction. ― Antoine de Saint-Exupery
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart. ― Helen Keller
There is no remedy for love but to love more. — Henry David Thoreau
Nothing raises one’s spirits more than signs of spring. Blue skies, sunlight, colorful trees and flowers. Even a quick spring shower. These conditions are especially effective in healing the spirits of someone who has been more or less confined for the month of March.
But time wasn’t wasted. Some things are done effectively from the recliner with a laptop at hand. Most of the time, however, I slept and read, and took more pain meds and slept some more, and read. When I had my wits about me, I was spring cleaning the computer and my website.
Not all is back in order as you’ll notice on the site. I’m working with the theme designer to work out the kinks and hope to have everything running in tip-top shape soon. Or at least as soon as my pain management doctor says I’m good to go off the current regimen.
I’m so glad to be back among you, my writing friends, and hope to have plenty of reading material for you soon.
Tomorrow look for my review of Pamela Jane’s memoir, An Incredible Talent for Existing. Pamela is likely well-known to many of you as a regular on Women’s Memoirs.