Somehow I believed it was my obligation to try to do the right thing by her because she had given birth to me.Burdened with constant worry for her father and the guilt caused by her mother’s narcissism, D.G. Kaye had a short childhood. When she moved away from home at age eighteen, she began to grow into herself, overcoming her lack of guidance and her insecurities. Her life experiences became her teachers, and she learned from the mistakes and choices she made along the way, plagued by the guilt she carried for her mother.
Conflicted Hearts is a heartfelt journey of self-discovery and acceptance, an exploration of the quest for solace from emotional guilt.
(Synopsis and image via Goodreads)
Imagine feeling frustrated and powerless in a situation you're desperate to resolve. When you're a child, that angst multiplies immensely because you are only that--a child. You have no power to speak out about what you're feeling, and neither are you permitted to ask questions that might soothe your inner turmoil, because the cause of your dilemmas are adult matters that apparently shouldn't concern you. ~ D.G. Kaye, Conflicted Hearts
At the beginning of Chapter 8 of Conflicted Hearts , the same chapter from which the above quote is taken, D.G. Kaye writes the following:
We are the products of our parents. How can they teach us what they didn't know?
Likely, these words resonate with more than one reader with parents from the same generation as Kaye's.
The author's fluid writing style and storyteller's voice gives the reader a sense of sitting down over a steaming cup of coffee or tea with a friend. The friend begins to tell you what life was like for her as a child. You sit in disbelief, wondering how this positive, strong, loving woman lived through the parenting received at the mind and hands of her mother.
Yet, our author and friend lives with a guilt burdening her for far too long. This is the skin she wants to shed--the skin of her guilt feelings. It appears to this reader nothing has been D.G. Kaye's fault with respect to her mother and her mother's behavior. The guild is just another layer applied like frosting on a cake. Only this isn't frosting. It isn't sweet, and it leaves an acid taste in your mouth.
D.G. Kaye is not ashamed nor abashed about telling her story and sharing it with those willing to read. Her truthful memories will unfasten for others the doors to walk through to the other side of life. Life filled with love, happiness, and respect.
Thank you to the author for the gift of her words.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who lived through an emotionally and verbally abusive childhood, one like D.G. Kaye's. Remember, you are not the one at fault, and reading Kaye's memoir will help you understand that.
Publisher: D.G. Kaye
Published: January 9, 2014
Kindle Edition: 202 pages
Disclaimer: I received a copy of Conflicted Heartsfrom the author in exchange for a fair and honest review. The opinions expressed here are solely my own.
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Meet D.G. Kaye:
D.G. Kaye is a nonfiction writer of memoirs about her life experiences, matters of the heart and women’s issues. She began writing when pen and paper became tools to express her pent-up emotions during a turbulent childhood. D.G.'s writing began as notes and cards she wrote for the people she loved and admired when she was afraid to use her own voice. D.G. journaled about life, and her opinions on people and events. She later began writing poetry and health articles for a Canadian magazine as her interest was piqued by natural healthcare.
Becoming interested in natural healing and remedies, D.G. began reading extensively on the subject after encountering quite a few serious health issues—family and her own. Against many odds, Kaye has overcome adversity several times throughout her life.
Kaye began writing books to share her stories and inspiration. She looks for the good and the positive in everything and believes in paying it forward. “For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”
Her favourite saying: Live. Laugh. Love …and don’t forget to breathe! is her website logo, to remind herself and others that we often forget to take a pause.
You can find D.G. on social media and her author and blog pages:
(Image and bio via Goodreads)